I have had many conversations with people over the years about 'broken families' and 'broken homes'. One conversation recently prompted me to write an article and send it out to my email list. My view is that a home where two people can't get along and that is volatile is the home that is broken. If you can't fix it after trying everything then you leave. Too many people want to stay in a home that is not peaceful because of some ideological view of what a family and a home means. While in a perfect world a family would always stay together and love one another. We don't live in a perfect world though and so we have to move on and we can only do that when we make peace with it and learn to love ourselves again.
Maybe it's because we say we have 'broken up' or been through a 'breakup' that we use similar language about the home that happened in. If you can't renovate the relationship and therefore the home then it might be time to move on. Some things can't be fixed because they aren't broken. They have just got to the end of their lifespan.
I don't have all the answers but I will always ask myself the questions. And I will have the conversations with others who are open to discussing these topics because that's how I learn, how I grow and how I develop a more peaceful mindset. If you want to read the full article you can find it read more here.
#families #relationships #brokenhomes #parenting
So today I went out with a friend for a walk around out town. There are a lot of independent businesses and shops in our main street. In the near future I am going to start hosting events for women in business in this area and wanted to introduce myself and gauge interest. What was interesting was the response. In one store the young women who is the store manager could not have been nicer. She asked if she could have some info to give to some of her clients and was bubbly and happy. The rest of her staff were also cheery and the whole place had a good vibe. In some of the other stores and businesses I went into it just felt like the people did not want to be there and they couldn't wait to leave. Those businesses had an oppressive energy and weren't places you would want to stay in or spend your money in.
It got me thinking about how we are responsible for how we show up. Many years ago I worked in real estate. It's amazing how you could always tell if a home was happy or not. If a couple were going through a breakup or just had an argument you could feel it in the air. In business and at work too we can often sense when something is not right or someone has something going on in their life that they are struggling with.
Jill Bolte Taylor worked in the area of brain science and had a stroke. As a result of that stroke she lost her capacity to speak. What she gained was a heightened sense of feeling people's energy. She wrote a book called 'My Stroke of Insight' which is well worth the read otherwise find her on TED talks and have a listen to her story. We are all responsible for how we show up when we are engaging with others, whether that be at work, with children, partner or friends. Just spend a bit of time reflecting on what sort of impact you want to have and try your best to make sure that your energy matches your intention. If it doesn't then do something to change it. Dance, give yourself a pep talk, put on a smile, listen to some great music that makes you happy or go for a walk. And if you truly feel that today you can't elevate your energy then just understand that will impact on how others respond to you. You might not get the results you want from your interactions.
Tony Robbins is probably the greatest coach in the world. I was listening to one of his videos recently and he was explaining the fundamentals of leadership. This is what they are.
So today, tomorrow, this week. create a better world for yourself by following theses three steps. And make a way to improve your life. A true leader will either make a way or find one to have a life they love and that serves others as well.
Happy action taking!
Til next time
The photo of the door in this blog was taken on a recent holiday in Bali. It was a large door at the front on a home.
I remember when I was much younger reading a book by W Clement Stone. He states that big doors swing on little hinges. And when i look at a door now I remember that quote. A door can be very large and heavy and yet the hinges can be small and seemingly insignificant.
I believe that we are all hinges. We can make things happens. And there are things that will never happen without us doing our bit. I would encourage you to always see yourself as a hinge. You can move things and overcome things that seem much larger than you. None of your attempts are in vain.
So this week, get out there are swing some doors.
Have a great week.
til next time
Many people may have heard me speak of earth families, birth families and others. You may have heard others speak of people coming into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
While we all have a family of origin, they are not always the family that we turn to for support, fun, to share good news or bad news or choose to spend our social time with. Earth families are the support that we create around ourselves as we grow older. While birth families are important, they ensure we arrive on the planet, birth families allow us the space and the support to grow.
For some people, earth families and birth families are the same. For others birth families and earth families are quite different and they may have little to do with their birth families. I am part of the latter group. Not because I am not grateful for my birth family, I am, but because I have no history with them. I was estranged from them at a young age and so created a new support network.
The others I speak of are those people who are acquaintances. We may meet them through our job or in our daily lives. Never underestimate your power in that situation to make someone else's life better. Go through life with a smile and share your joy of living with the world. Be grateful for everyone that you meet. For some people that may be the only time they are acknowledged.
If you would like to read the newsletter that I wrote on earth families, click here . If you like our newsletter please subscribe and make sure you never miss another one.
To hear an interview I did on radio last year click here
Sherry is the principal coach and blogger at Inner Rhythm.