When you became a parent did you imagine it would be a fun, joyous adventure?

If you are honest though you'd say it was scary to think how you'd be able to pass on all your passions, wisdom, hopes, dreams, values and your beliefs

You felt really positive and excited about what the experience of being a parent might bring, but things just haven't turned out the way you hoped

Right now you have had enough and you just don't know what to do next

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Dear exhausted, frustrated parent

Does your home feel more like a war zone than the safe haven, the peaceful space you want it to be?

You don't need to despair any longer.  There is hope for you and your teen.  You can build a harmonious relationship and help your teen to acquire the tools for life, the sort that will help them to be the very best they can beRight now though that might feel like a world away, an impossible dream. 

Do You...

• Feel like your teenager has little or no respect for your opinion and all they do is ignore anything you have to say to them
• Dread the thought of coming home from work or your teenager coming home from school because the next battle is only a matter of a few words away
• Struggle to recognise the great things your teenager is doing because you feel so disconnected from them, disagree with their choices or simply can’t understand where they are coming from
• Find it hard to support them and what they want to do and become because you just can’t understand or relate to their passions, the things that actually make them who they are
• Cringe when you are out with your teenager in public at the thought of what they might do or say or what they are wearing
• Are sure that every time you try to sit down and try to talk with your teen it will end in an argument?  That just won’t listen. They answer your questions with either a grunt or a single word
• Feel like if you dare comment on anything in your teen’s life (their clothes, choices, friends, interests, what they eat, how they spend their time... anything!) that you’ll be under vicious attack
• Are really sad when you stop and reflect on how isolated you are from your teen.  It is so hard to see how easily they can connect with others when they just see you as the enemy
• Feel rejected by your teen. It seem like they are on a dedicated mission to contradict all of your values, beliefs and ideas.  Does this leave you feeling like these things that are important to you aren’t worth anything at all?
• Have tried to ‘play’ their game and they’ve seen straight through it and all you got was more dis-harmony and they refused to open up and express their problems, their dilemmas.  Now you feel more in the dark than you did before.
• Feel like your teen finds it easier to lie to you than tell you the truth
• Are sick and tired of your teen being a ‘know it all’?
• Constantly feel disappointed as a parent by how your teen is ‘turning out’.  You feel you have done everything you possibly can to raise them to be great people but still you ask yourself ‘What happened?  How did this happen? Where did I go wrong?” over and over again
• Struggle to trust your teen. You want to trust them but don’t feel like you can because all they’ve shown you is the bad choices they keep on making and example after example of how they’re just not trustworthy
• Feel like you need to constantly monitor your teen because if you’re not right there with them they are just going to do something wrong, again

Would you love to

• Be the person your teen admires most and looks up to for support, guidance and inspiration?
• Be able to have a heartfelt discussion with your team when you need to 'talk about something'? 
  
• Experience a harmonious, joyful, peaceful relationship with your teen where you both feel connected and have a genuine friendship?
• See your teen full of confidence, self assured, able to make good decisions that are right for them and support their well being emotionally, physically and spiritually?
• Watch your teen step fully into their own power and live a life they love?
• Have a relationship founded on mutual respect and admiration?
• Be able to confidently allow your teen to explore their world, trusting that they'll share the experience with you, let you into their life?

As a parent of teens I understand what it's like when you feel like you and your teen speak different languages.  I understand what it's like to feel like you are living on different planets and I know it can feel like if only you found the right translator it would be so much easier to know what’s going on and what to do next

The good news is that you can create harmony at home.  You can experience a life where everything flows smoothly, where communication channels are open, where there is respect and trust and your home is once again a safe, peaceful haven